Poison Ivy: 3


“This is so freaking hard.”

Are you complaining, Juniper? About those beautiful babies?


“…only a little. They’re just so… loud.”

True, true. The twins are loud. Probably something to do with their namesake—no one named Nightshade and Rosary Pea (Rosary for short), two of the deadliest plants in the world could be easy to raise. You really brought that on yourself, Juniper.


“I thought it was appropriate. Now hush, else you’ll wake them.”

…they’re crying again, my dear.


At least now you get to prove that you’re actually a good mom. I think you’re doing a fine job.

The life of a new mother is never easy, but the life of a new single mother of twins is quite challenging, as Juniper is finding. I never expected that she would have a good time of it, but she was really struggling.


She’s just been chugging water. What is that about? I would have understood if she were downing alcohol—something flaming, maybe—but water? Maybe it’s a placebo kind of thing; she can’t drink the bad stuff, so she simulates it with the boring stuff instead.

Either way, it’s real weird Juniper. And it makes you have to pee all the time, and somehow the water cups go bad and start to smell overnight. Pick a better habit.


“I’ll have the habits I have. These babies are exhausting.”

They do seem especially difficult. Little Rosary, over on the left—the second born of the little ladies—likes to be second in everything. Every time Nightshade cries, she cries. Every time Nightshade wakes, she wakes. The only thing Rosary isn’t second in is shitting—she does a lot of shitting. Way more than Nightshade. They’re an odd little duo.


“Odd is one word for it.”


You got them both down at once, though! I’d say that’s an accomplishment. Be proud of yourself, Juniper. You’re doing a good job.


“Oh, thank the Creator.”

Oh thank me.


Another day and I think she might have killed them—or passed out and wet herself simultaneously. Devil babies, the both of them.

I do love you, Nightshade and Rosary. Beloveds of the Creator, children of the Chosen. But you are devil babies.


Nightshade promises to stay that way. She dreams of being a whiz kid, which wouldn’t be so bad except for the fact that smart kids are much harder to raise than dumb ones. But Nightshade rolled the evil trait.

That’ll be an interesting kid to raise. Good luck, Juniper.

Maybe her sister will balance her out, though.


Rosary looked like a little flower child from the moment she grew up; not like her darker big sister. And as a lover of the outdoors, hopefully she’d be more inclined to use her Social Butterfly skills for good.

Only time will tell, however. Only time will tell.

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