People speak of babies with great levity: oh, the responsibility; oh, the pressure; oh, the hardship; oh, the change. Mostly of the change—how your relationships will change, your behaviors will change, your habits, your work schedule, your entire life. It’s all meant to change when you add babies.
But, as I told Apollo, things wouldn’t be that different. I knew, from my experience with Apollo, that things didn’t have to change that much. And, since I now had another body the house who, though not exactly responsible, was capable of watching out for some siblings, the change was even.
Really, the most impactful thing was the remnants of my pregnancy hormones, making me crave funtimes and woohoo at all hours of the day (by the Creator, were they impactful).
I trusted Apollo with the responsibility. More than that, I trusted that it would change his feelings on his siblings. He was still so distant from them, and still from me, even months after they were born, spending most of his time on the computer or doing schoolwork. It was saddening, but I figured that it was only to be expected. If he had been worried for so long that the babies would replace him in my affections, the problem wouldn’t be instantly solved by the babies being born.
I tried to reassure him on a regular basis but, you know… I was busy. Now that the babies were born, I had to renew my focus on my passions: kissing people and selling things to people who wanted to… kiss.
I was, of course, more focused on the former. Pregnancy hormones, Janelle, remember? I’m actually surprised with how little interest you have in your sexuality and woohooing needs, considering how dedicated you made me to mine…
Then again, it’s probably not a surprise how innocent you’ve been. Once you were out of me, you were quite dedicated to keeping me from getting any. It seemed like anytime I got close, you’d scream.
Maybe it wasn’t the most responsible thing for me to do. But, if you’ve learned anything about me at this point in the story, it should be that I wasn’t always the most responsible. And I knew it! I just didn’t particularly care about the shortcoming, and had no intention to resolve it. I was responsible enough—my twin babies were at home with some supervision, where they would be safe and wouldn’t catch strange diseases from unvaccinated daycare germ monsters. And my son was at home learning how to be responsible.
Hm… a little hypocritical, that. Me flouting my responsibility, while making Apollo learn some…
I had a good time.
Things escalated rather quickly after that.
You know, it worked for me, Janelle. The system that I created that day. I only came out on my… dates, you might say… after Apollo came home from school, so that he could keep an eye on you and Hari. He knew that, if anything went wrong, he was to call me. And, if I couldn’t be reached? There were always neighbors across the street.
That way, I didn’t have to admit to being a single mom (which often scared away the younger, less mature men (most often the most attractive too)) and wasn’t interrupted by screaming babies every five minutes. It was a win-win.
And then I could come home, eat some things, spend some time with my quietly sleeping baby-cuties, and go to bed.
Did I get to spend much time with Apollo this way? I mean, no. Not so much. Most often, the second he came home from school, I set out some sandwich ingredients and headed straight out the door.
But he was fine with it. When I was young, I remember resenting my parents a bit for any kind of hovering they did. I wanted to be independent, to do my own thing. And as long as Apollo was passing his classes and staying out of trouble, I could let him be independent in that way. I could see nothing wrong with it.
Especially when it kept my dates from balking away.
It was kind of funny how high and squeaky their voices got, when they found out that I was a single mother of three.
Definitely not as funny when they said that they weren’t ready for that kind of responsibility, and high tailed it before I could get so much as a quickie behind a bush…
Yeah, the park system definitely worked better for me.
Much, much better.